World full of liars and untrue people

Alright, like the title goes, this post shall be rather mean and nasty with regards to my complains, my thoughts and of cos, my trademark pessimistic views about humans. So, i would seriously suggest any readers to stop right here, if you're ain't in the mood to read some craps, or if you are here hoping to read something less offensive. Period.

For some apparent reasons, my mood starts to get bad yet again. Not that i'm one who flares up, hurl vulgarities, smoke or drink, i'm just bottled up with frustrations and anger why this world is getting ugly each day i lived. Yeah i know, probably someone who be saying, "Aiya, you can't expect everyone to think like you what.", but whatever the case, the reason why there's politics, riots, fights, racism, etc, is simply because of the fact, humans ain't one who will let their pride down. Who likes to eat humble pie anyway?

Looking back at the point of time when i just enlisted for National Service back in September, i made some new friends, and sad to say, how many are still friends now? But.. there's always this "but", and that's i've already accepted the fact that, friends are really just mere humans who either you seek them for accompany when you fancy one, or they are just humans who appoarch you when they need accompany. It's a vice versa thing. Wouldn't have take long for one to understand what i meant.

I know, i made the term "friends" look real ugly. But think about it, it's true. The only thing is, to what extend it is.

Some might use the word 'passerby' for those who came into their lives and left only footprints behind. Some might use the word 'hi-bye friends' for those who iterally greets you hi and bids you bye, other than that, total strangers. Some might use 'assholes', 'bastard', 'bitch' and 'slut' for those whom you loved but ended up being hurt. Come to think again, calling someone that after you used to call them 'dear', 'dar', 'darling' and etc, is just funny isn't it? Nevertheless, love and hatred is just a thin line drawn between them.

Practice makes perfect, yet no one is perfect, so why practise?

Perhaps this statement kinda justified the fact that, why no matter how i feel, how i think, there's no right or wrong. Just a matter of personal interpretation of things and personal point of view.

I was about to stop here, cause even though i started off typing this post with much enthusiasm, i'm feeling kinda no point rattling out my thoughts now. Cause at the end of the day, i will just get comments or remarks which will iterally shuts me up. Not to say that's a bad thing, at least when i'm thrown with remarks which shuts me up, it means that i've see another side of things, which i wasn't able to initially. So i guess, i'll just share with you guys some unpleasant incidents i had these weeks.

There's one notable incident which kinda pissed me off. Perhaps i shouldn't put it as an incident, it's more like those people around me in my 02/06 Air Grading Course. Probably not very beneficial for me to mention this here, especially since this blog is rather open to all, but if you happen to be one of those i mentioned, in any of my posts, which you felt i made up the story or distorted the fact, please feel free to tag and correct me.

My course mates, i must say, probably due to the fact that we have already sort of got in tuned with one another, after spending quite some time together, the friendly courteous behaviour seems to be fading each day. Not forgetting many of them are rather successful in many ways. Hawk and Taurus company best, ex-national snooker player, national rock climber, youth flying club member, and a couple from well-to-do families. Well, you name it, we have it. But there's something i think they lack; Modesty.

I'm not sure if it's the pilot-to-be attitude they had or just their own personal character, some of them tend to be rather untactful with what they say. Perhaps they might have not meant it, but somehow just somehow, they projected a very arrogant and selfish attitude. Something which i often see in them is that they like to bad mouth the rest of the course mates, insulting one another behind their backs, and the one which got me real pissed, was to disturb for no apparent reasons.

I was disturbed for using too much of my mobile phone, being disturbed many a times for sms-ing. Then one would question why do they want to do that? Not that my sms-ing will cause them to lose anything, but because i'm using a mobile which allows gaming; N-Gage QD.

And guess to what extremes they would want me to do so that they get to play? Due to the fact that my inbox has accumulated 2000+ sms, which results in low phone memory for gaming, they expect me to delete all my messages, just to allow them to be able to play the games. And what if i'm sms-ing? They will want to exchange their SIM cards with me, so that they can continue to game without interruption. One even offered to exchange mobile phone over the night, cause i was telling him my mobile battery was running low.

Perhaps just to seek some fun or something, they will then teased me by mentioning the person's name of which i'm sms-ing. I don't know how you guys would react to it, but deep down, i was very irritated by that. And to play things down, i walked away from them, cause i didn't want to say or do anything which is insensible. But at the end of the day, the cycle just keep repeating.

Sad to say, i never enjoy being a pilot trainee even till now. I've seen too many arrogant seniors, too many unfriendly pilots and too many regimental duties and responsibilities. And because of this, i'm often asking myself, why am i doing this for? Being a pilot has increasingly becoming a burden to me.

Put aside my pilot friends, friends who are still considered close to me are fading in numbers too. Won't want to go into all the whining of why and such, but i'm getting sick with the fact, people can be nice to you for a moment, turn their back around out of the sudden, and come back to you again for help. Treating you nice, telling you things which make you float up the air, but at the end of the day, you just felt like you have just gone through a beautiful dream, and that's all. All fake and just like bubbles, beautiful yet it doesn't last.

And because of things like that, you wonder who are true to you, who are liars. Somehow the definitions of all these seems blurred and vague.

Everything i've mentioned so far makes one wonder if my friends are that bad and is my life that messed up. To be fair to my friends, generally they are considered good, at least they didn't bring me to hell, as for my life, i reckon i just need more new chapters, more chapters of enjoyment.

Alright, i'll close this chapter here. Leave you guys with the OST of Spiderman 2 and the lyrics extracted from it:

"We spend our whole lives searching for all the things we think we won, when never really knowing what we have."