I'll fall asleep tonight, cause that brings me closer to you

Once again, it's been donkey years since i last blogged. After reading my army upper-study's blog, i decided to add this post. Had this emo feeling after reading his last post, that his close pal in poly ended his own life just a week back. Even though i'm not that close with my upper-study, not to mention that i don't know his friend, but the post for a moment makes me paused and think about my friends.

I'm sure you guys reading this right now, has no qualms about me being someone who doesn't really treasure or value friendship alot. I used to tell my friends; friends are just tools to make use of, like it or not. Not that i'm betrayed by friends to have this negative view, nor that i'm often being made use to feel the need to reciprocate their actions.

Putting my partner aside, since my younger days, i have not much close friends whom i will relate my heart to. More than often i tend to hear more, than to say more. And lately, i'm into the extreme case of: "even if you tell me, i'll just listen and not say much." Probably due to the fact that i've seen or heard too much, it just gets "uninteresting" when friends share their problems with me. Yeah, if you read this, i sincerely apologised for being a bad friend, if you take me as one, and that i'm also trying to make my life better.

I'm not too sure how i would react if someone, whom i've known and have quite close days in the past, passed away. Maybe i shall state clearly my foreword now, since i'm not really sure that i'll be sad for you, don't be when it's my turn. Just remember i did crossed your path and left some footprints, somewhere in your life, and that's all that matters.

Just some quick updates; i'll be having my mid-term break starting this weekend for a week and i'm getting fatter. Let's talk about the latter first. I saw Crystal's blog regarding HIIT. Basically it's just like what i've learnt during my army days, popularly known as 30-60. I seriously need to get myself on this workout real soon to cut my fats. I need to feel my washboard abs again. And please, do pray for me that every Sat will be sunny. At least just between 10am to 2pm, with bright sunlight and clear skies. I'm badly in need of a good tan.

Going to my studies, i seriously have thoughts about quitting school. Now i can fully understand why my friend chose to opt out of Honours and leave after 2 years. Everyone is so competitive, and i just hate to be in this environment. Even my friend, Eugene seems to be so result-oriented. Not that i'm against that, but i just feel that, if the most optimal end-state is what everyone desires, who will actually bothers about the process? Sounds nobel-ly insane, but yeah, i think i learnt more when i don't hate the lecturer/tutor for a particular module and i don't have result-oriented peers around.

There will be numerous tests and assignments due after the short mid-term break. I guess i will be mugging my days off when the break starts. If you're reading this, do say your prayers or whatsoever to help me see through this semester in a piece. Else not, thanks for reading, and have a nice day.

Till then.